Should I Fight for My Ex? Is It Worth It?

Should I fight for my ex after the breakup or give up? It's not an easy decision whether it's worth fighting for your ex or accepting the fact that it doesn't make sense.

Maybe you're torn between your feelings and your reason. It doesn't matter how high the chances are, it's much more important what the reasons for the separation were.

In many cases, the breakup was only due to unfortunate circumstances and a lack of communication, while sometimes there are obvious reasons why it is impossible to have a happy relationship with your ex again.

Should I Fight for My Ex? Is It Worth It?

Why you should fight for your ex - 3 reasons

Here are some reasons to do whatever it takes to win them back:

1. You still love them

If you still love deep down in your heart, there is no reason why you should not fight. It would be logically easy to give up, but you know it's impossible to fight your feelings. It is far too important to you not to make one last attempt to convince them to give you two another chance.

2. Your relationship has been great most of the time 

If your relationship used to feel easy and carefree and you've been through a lot together, then it's understandable that you don't want to give up so easily. You will only find a few people with whom you are on the same wavelength. So it can be worth fighting for that relationship and trying to rebuild it.

3. You regret your behavior in the relationship 

For you, the breakup was a wake-up moment in which you realized how you had changed negatively throughout the relationship. Only in hindsight do you realize what mistakes you made and that you played a big part in the fact that you grew apart. You would like to turn back time and hope that it is possible to prove to your ex that you recognize your mistakes and are willing to change for them.

With all the reasons to fight for your ex, there are also many reasons you should have in mind before you make a final decision on how to proceed.

Why you shouldn't fight for your ex - 3 reasons

Here are some reasons not to fight for your ex:

1. They love someone else and ignore you

If you feel like they've fallen in love again and aren't paying any more attention to you, then it's best not to. You deserve to be valued and should have enough self-respect to stop seeing them as the center of the world. No matter how much it hurts when they love someone else and even ignore you, then you should let go. In that case, fighting for them makes no sense because you would only be good enough for them at the moment if their partner rejected them.

2. There have been breaches of trust 

If there have been breaches of trust in the relationship and you feel that the trust cannot be restored, then you should walk away from the relationship. Without trust, there can be no successful relationship, and a breach of trust will always stand between you, no matter how much you convince yourself that yours isn't the case.

3. You've already fought

If you've already tried everything and it didn't work, then you had better give up. There comes a point when you need to let go and focus on yourself. You can't force them to give you another chance, you know that!

How to fight for your ex

If you've decided to fight for your ex, there are a few important things to keep in mind:

1. Be honest with yourself

Examine your reasons for wanting to fight for your ex and be honest with yourself. Make sure you are genuinely willing to fight for the relationship and not just out of fear of being alone or out of habit. Don't make the mistake of clinging to the thought that without them you would never be happy again.

2. Talk to your ex

If you want to fight for your ex, you need to talk to them. If you haven't been in contact since the breakup, ask them for a clarifying conversation. In the discussion, you have to find out what were the real reasons that led to the breakup and what you both want for the future. Be prepared to make compromises and listen carefully.

3. Take your time

Rebuilding a relationship takes time. Don't rush things, and take your time to solve your problems. Don't set unrealistic expectations, and be patient. Even if you would like to get back together with them as soon as possible, I would advise against it. The danger of separating again shortly after the reconciliation is much greater than if you take it slow and dare a real new beginning.

4. Learn from the past

Identify the mistakes that were made and work to correct them. Also, try to establish new habits and behaviors to make your relationship successful. No relationship is perfect, it is important to talk to each other a lot and to work together to deepen your connection to move from the pure infatuation phase to long-term love. Unfortunately, this is where most couples fail or give up too soon.


Whether it's worth fighting for your ex or not depends on many factors that you can only judge for yourself. If you still have strong feelings for them and believe they're "the one," then fighting for the relationship can be worthwhile no matter how much other people advise you not to.

But if there have been breaches of trust or he only sees you as a "second choice," then no matter how much you still love them, you should let go. If you do decide to fight for them, be honest with yourself, seek clarifying conversation, don't rush things, and learn from the past. A successful relationship requires work and compromises on both sides, but if you're both willing, then a love comeback is possible.

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